Invitation

Come one and all to the disease playground hosted by yours truly.

Ah, work college with the throat infection of course you are welcome. No don't bother staying home from work just because you are sick, by all means, cough and splutter around here as much as you like.

Oh, and Master runny nose I see you have brought your friend stuffy head. You must have heard that throat infection was passing by and thought you would join us.

Why sir, what a surprise, I have heard many dangerous rumours about you. Mister fever please let me introduce you to some other guests, sit over here by my 2 paracetamol friends.

And who do we have here? Well really, at long last, I was beginning to think you would not join me. You have surely visited every other pregnant woman I know except for me. Come right this way Mr heartburn you have been expected for some time.

Now that you are all gathered here, let me just say it has been a delightful week at home on sick leave. But if you don't mind, kindly f$%k off and leave me and my precious baby alone.